Say Anything
by strawberry.ragdoll
Summary: Until they met each other, neither of them really lived; during one summer they fix that.


AN: Some AkuRoku. Cannot get over this god damned couple. sigh. This story is meant to be read the way I put it, don't pay attention to the numbers for now unless you get confused. I actually didn't mean to Tarantino it, I was just writing little snippets of this story and it came out like this... and I like it better this way.

Disclaimer: I don't own these two, I don't own anything from KH, I don't own the song this story was named after (not the movie).

Warning: Boysex. Mild(ish) language.

* * *

1.

It scared him, sometimes. How this was the best thing that had ever happened to him, how content he was. It felt like he was squandering all his life's happiness into these long days, these even longer nights with Axel. The universe wasn't this kind; it would get back at him. It would take Axel away. It would take away the sun, the sea, the sky.

Because he would give himself to Axel completely.

And Axel would leave.

* * *

2.

The first time they talked was at a bonfire party. It was quite something that they met at all. Axel was a member of the Dumb Drunk Fucks, yelling, throwing inane shit in the fire, doing retarded stunts for attention. Tonight that consisted of stealing liquor from the already wasted to smash in the fire in a blaze of glory ('Alcohol abuse!' yelled the Girls and Boys with Daddy Issues) and using other Dumb Drunk Fucks as body boards. Roxas, however, was a member of the Fuckin' Classy. They were somewhere between the Only Have a Few Social Drinks (but less faux-intellectual) and the Pretentious Art School Kids (but less, well, pretentious). This means he was with his band of Fuckin' Classy peers, wearing their Doc Martens, talking about Led Zeppelin, and sipping Belvedere and Grey Goose straight out of the bottle at their makeshift picnic table. It was strange for these groups to be together in the first place, but for one night a year, the Chronically Slutty and the Actually Focused danced together, the Burnouts and the Wannabes talked, the raw and rowdy mixed with the tame and tender. It so happened that immediately after high school exams were finished on this small island, every year, the college kids who were visiting home threw a party for everyone, so Axel and Roxas are in the same vicinity for the first time since anyone cares to remember.

They have looked at each other before, but tonight they lock eyes and it just so happens that this is the first time Axel and Roxas ever see each other. It is not love at first (fourth? seventh?) sight like in the stories, but it's pleasant. Roxas would remember a spark in his stomach akin to arousal, the way Axel smiles all crooked, nursing his beer bottle. Axel would remember _wanting_ him, not sexually, just to talk all night, figure out why those eyes were so bright and that face so unassuming. However, Axel had just broken up with his girlfriend and Roxas was sitting next to his.

It was weird.

* * *

4.

They woke up the next day on the beach.

"Nnn…." Axel stretched. His front got wet. How did these two things fit together? His light was bright, far too bright. Oh God. What was all that racket? Where was he? Time to go back to bed. But this wasn't bed. His head hurt. His everything hurt. Open eyes – bad idea. Don't open eyes. That's not his light at all. Try to discern where you are—

"Wake up, sunshine!" A swift kick to his side. That annoying voice.

"Shhhut up Dem…" Axel rolled over and was greeted with sand in the mouth. Sand? He jerked up and looked around, his eyes taking longer than his brain to adjust to his surroundings. The beach. They were still on the beach. He looked over. Roxas was a few feet away, laughing at Axel's wet shirt. It took Axel a moment to realize that he had an empty cup on his chest while he was sleeping. Probably Roxas's, the little…

"Axel, it's hangover food time! I am not waiting to get the greasiest burger around so I can let you sleep out your hangover on the most uncomfortable spot known to man."

"'S not that uncomfy," groaned Axel. He looked over at his new companion, little and blond and just as beautiful when waking up with a hangover, _which is unfuckingfair, _Axel can't help but think with just a trace of bitter bitter bitterness, until Roxas smiles and he knows he can't stay mad at that. Hell, he probably couldn't even begin to be mad at that.

* * *

9.

The first time they have sex is too soon into their summer relationship. Neither has had anything resembling sex with another boy, just a few stolen kisses here or there.

Hormones on the fritz, they opt for a secluded area on the beach. Axel insists on seeing Roxas's face while they do it, which makes the blonde blush, which makes the redhead laugh. When it comes down to mechanics, however, things get more bumbling. Despite Axel's insistence that he could just try "sticking it in, maybe it'll fit," Roxas quietly mentions something about warming up with fingers. Axel is completely unsure if he should try this, but undeniably aroused. Once he opens Roxas, once Roxas is writhing beneath him, there is no doubt. Not anymore. One, pause, pleasure. Two, pause, pleasure. Three, pause, pleasure. The time comes then, when they can't take it anymore, when Axel has to be inside him and Roxas needs to feel him. When Axel removes his fingers and slides his member inside Roxas, they lose something essential and gain something better. Because it's tight, it hurts, it's painful, it's not perfect, it's only _perfect_ and great and awkward and new and amazing. And once it's done, once the explosions in Axel's eyes die and they have gone through all of their most embarrassing sex faces, Axel knows he will never love another person like this.

So they hold each other, unabashed and no longer anxious.

* * *

6.

Namine looked sad when Roxas broke the news that he liked another boy to her. They had been dating for two years, yet, oddly enough, she didn't seem surprised. She cried and asked if it was her fault, he apologized and insisted it wasn't, she said they felt more like friends anyway, he agreed, she laughed through her tears. They kissed one more time, and when Roxas left her house, he left with a bounce in his step.

Axel's coming to terms with it was different. He sat on his couch. "Yeah, dude, so. I think I have a thing for a guy."

Demyx kept strumming his guitar. "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Cool."

* * *

8.

The first kiss was Roxas's favourite part. Axel sat in his room, completely at ease, flipping through an alien-looking book. Roxas was messing with a clunky CD player, trying to find a decent song to settle on.

"So… you'd say we're friends, right?"

Roxas smiled, an eyebrow quirked. "I'd say we're a little more than that."

"Just checking, smartass."

It took Roxas a minute to find anything before he settled on one that sounded foreign to Axel. He turned to Axel, sitting cross-legged and leaning forward. "Come here." His voice wasn't much louder than the man singing in the song.

Axel was too lazy to ask why. He scooted over to Roxas, dropping the book on the floor. He sat right in front of the other boy, their knees touching. Roxas smiled. "Listen to this song. The first time I heard this, I fell in love."

And Axel did. With Roxas in front of him, shoulders relaxed, face content yet still excited to share something with his friend, Axel listened. And Axel fell in love. Slowly, he raised his hand to Roxas's cheek. Though both pretended it was nothing, their breath hitched. Then he inched forward and pressed a small kiss at the corner of Roxas's mouth.

Roxas closed his eyes and waited for Axel to lean back. "Axel… I. Can't really handle complicated right now. When you kiss me like that, it gets complicated." He didn't know if it was a lie or a test or both or neither, but when opened his eyes, and strangely enough, Axel was smiling.

"Roxas, this isn't complicated. This is simple. This is a kiss." He put his hand on the back of Roxas's head, pulling their foreheads together. And in that instant, Roxas loved him back.

* * *

5.

His ridiculously vibrant hair is out of place on Roxas's front porch. "I'm just proposing we actually get to know each other. We were a little drunk last time. I don't know about you, but I can't remember shit." Axel scratches the back of his head, almost looking embarrassed. Almost.

Roxas raised his eyebrows, leaning in his doorway. "Of course I don't remember anything. All I can recall is you pouring Jäger down my throat until I was sufficiently drunk."

"Yes, but in my defense, I was fairly drunk myself." Axel's smile was amiable, Roxas wouldn't have to look at it directly to feel the charm roll off in waves.

"I don't know, my friends wouldn't appreciate it if the old man who tried to take advantage of me last night came back."

"I have the best of intentions today, honest."

"What about tomorrow?"

"I'm not making any promises."

* * *

7.

Axel's end of the line was silent. Roxas knew exactly what he wanted to say, it was the getting it out part that seemed to hinder him. His hands shook a little on the phone, and he could hear the amusement in Axel's voice. "Got something to say, kid?"

Roxas gripped the phone tightly and stared at the ceiling. _You know it's important you jackass I know you feel it too_. "Axel… would you freak out if I told you something?" The fall. The silence. Heart. Beat. Heart. Beat. _Shut up heart shut up heart he can hear you. _Lying in his bed was supposed to be comforting right now, but it wasn't.

"No. No, I can't imagine I would." His voice was calm – forcedly so.

"We've been spending a lot of time together."

"That we have."

Roxas looked at his hands. "And… we've had a lot of fun."

"That too."

"I think I like you." The truth tumbled over the phone line, Roxas involuntarily biting his lip and covering the receiver. Really? That's the gem you come up with now? Mentally kicking himself, he tried to keep still so that the other end of the line wouldn't hear.

Then, laughter. "Do you, now?"

Roxas's face flushed. "Well, yeah." No point in lying now. As Axel's laughter continues, he falters. "I-I'm just gonna go."

"Roxas, don't hang up." Axel chuckles a few more times. "I like you too, you dramatic little thing. And it's definitely in the way you want."

Relief floods Roxas before he realizes something – "Don't call me a little thing!"

* * *

10.

"It's not like we didn't know this day was coming." Axel sounds flat. Cardboard. Concrete. Clay. Roxas hates this sound.

"Yeah." His mouth is dry. His hands are folded on his lap. His back is straight against the chair. His room was always a sanctuary for the two of them, but right now, he wants nothing more than to leave. To get out.

Axel's voice sounds less flat. Fizzy. Flighty. Fiery. "Is this the right thing to do? Should we have agreed on this? I think we should fight. I think I'm going to start a fight."

"No." His eyes are dry.

Axel starts to sound angry. Speed. Citrus. Sparks. "This is fucking stupid. This isn't a clean break. We want to be together, I know it'll be hard, but we can make it work. We're different. This wasn't just a summer romance and you know it."

"Yeah." All his answers are one-word syllables. When did he start speaking in one-word syllables? He knew this day would come. He knew it would hurt. He did it anyways. So why was he acting like such a child?

"Come on, Rox. Give me something." Axel slumps in front of his soon-to-be-ex, resting his head on Roxas's lap. "What's going on in there? I know you're not just sitting there, apathetic. Tell me something… anything."

Roxas doesn't. A tear just about slips out of his eye but he screams at himself in his head until it settles down, then he gives Axel a kiss on the forehead.

A few hours later, Axel is going off to college. Roxas flips open his phone as he watched the old truck putter down the road, thinking about Axel. How much it would hurt him if he would say something. Say anything.

* * *

3.

"Roxas, right?" Axel smiled, Jägermeister in hand. "I'm Axel. I've seen you around a lot, but we've never really talked, have we?"

A few of Roxas's tablemates give him a strange look, but Roxas smiles up. "Yeah, your reputation precedes you. Tonight you're outdoing yourself. I've been watching you nearly drown a few kids."

Axel smiles again, enflamed hair and green green eyes glowing in the firelight. Roxas keeps smiling, soft hair and the sky in his eyes. And they wouldn't remember the next morning, but at this moment they would realize they were meant to be together.

* * *

AN: I was going to make this multichapter, but I think it might be better as a standalone. Tell me what you think? Also, the song they kiss to is New Slang by the Shins. Read and review, please.


End file.
